Now Jay Leno knows how to roast! A Political Roast
"What a difference a couple of weeks makes. Remember last month, the three auto company heads flew to Washington in private jets looking for their bailout? Remember they own the private jets? Well, this time, the three CEOs drove in their own hybrid cars; 520 miles they drove in their own hybrid cars. See, you know what I think the government should have done here? Make it like 'The Amazing Race,' you see? You drop these guys off, no money, no transportation, give them some tools, they have to build a car. First one to Washington, they get the bailout." --Jay Leno
"In fact, do you know what the highest-paying line of work is in America right now? Jury duty." --Jay Leno
"Hey, did you see that picture on the front page of USA Today yesterday of Arnold Schwarzenegger shaking hands with Barack Obama? Didn't it look like one of those ads for one of those bad buddy action movies from the '80s, you know? [as Schwarzenegger] He's a strongman from Austria. He's an African-American from Chicago. They fight crime; they're ebony and ivory." --Jay Leno
"President Bush and his lovely wife Laura have purchased a new home in Dallas, Texas, worth $2 million. See, this is where President Bush has outsmarted everybody. People underestimate this guy. Five months ago, you would have had to pay $10 million bucks for that house, but thanks to his economic plan, he got it at a bargain. The man is a genius!" --Jay Leno
"How does that work when the president applies for a home loan? Like, when they do a credit check, do they include the trillion-dollar deficit?" --Jay Leno
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